Me lo pasó Mr. Kino.

Espero que lo disfruten.


To Latino employees New Policy for Latino Employees effective immediately

Several visitors to our office have brought to our attention that our Spanish-speaking employees commonly use offensive language.. Such behavior, in addition to violating firm practices, is highly unprofessional, offensive both to visitors and employees, and will not be tolerated. We have decided to implement a series of rules in our office and would expect them to be applied. It is expected that ALL employees immediately adhere to these rules:

1 – Phrases like ‘cabrón’, ‘ah, chingado’, ‘ como chingas’, and other such expressions will not be used for emphasis, no matter how heated the discussion may get.

2 – Non-important matters should not be addressed as ‘pendejadas’.

3 – You will not say ‘la cagó’ when someone makes a mistake, or ‘ya cago el palo’ if you see someone being reprimanded. All forms and derivatives of the word ‘cagar’ are inappropriate in our environment.

4 – Lack of determination will not be referred to as ‘falta de huevos’, nor will a person with lack of initiative be referred to as ‘huevon ‘ or ‘mamón’.

5 – No Manager or Supervisor, under any circumstances, will be referred to as ‘hijo de la chingada’, ‘culero’ or ‘ese cabrón’.

6 – When a proposal is presented, the phrase ‘estas son babosadas’ must not be used.

7 – Unusual or creative brainstorming meetings will not be referred to as ‘pinche chingaderas’.

8- Do not say ‘como jode’ if a person is persistent, or ‘se jodió’ if somebody is going through a difficult situation. Furthermore, you must not say ‘puta madre’ or ‘esto ya valió madre’ when matters become
complicated in your line of work.

9 – When asking someone to leave you alone, you should not say ‘vete a la chingada cabron’.

10- Do not substitute ‘¿Que Chingados quieres?’ for ‘May I help you?’

11- When leaving the office, using the phrase ‘me voy a la chingada’ is not proper.

12- When any office equipment fails, it must be reported as ‘it broke down’ not as ‘esta chingadera valió madre’.

13- Last but not least, after reading this memo, please do not say ‘me voy a limpiar el culo con esto’. Please file this memo properly.